Posted by: Prem Piyush | August 11, 2005

Dowry – A practical way to deal

The dowry system is a thorny bush which has grown in the sweet valley of love, the marriage. Many of my dear bloggers seem to be beating around the bush in discussions, some working hard to clean up weeds from the bush. Some are sitting silent helpless in the hands of their future determining guardians. Then what constructive work can be done against the evil. The first can be done now is to say…

“I am not going to take or give any dowry in my life”.

Can you repeat this promise from the bottom of your heart like me? If yes, then read keep reading or don’t waste your precious time here.

First of all, I use the dowry word for “forceful / with expectations” (hidden or shown) asking / giving money/gifts , which plays the main factor for determining any marriage.

Next thing is please don’t use the law book’s definition of dowry for the piece of paper or metal or degradable piece of object which parents/parents-in-law give with their blessings and affection to the new couple without any compulsion. The fact is in our Indian system, before departure of the guest or at auspicious occasions, elders do give few notes/coins to the children. Remember my word children. Even at the time of marriage any bride or groom is the same child in front of parents / parents-in-law. Even the cruelest law shall not stop this symbolized transfer of piece of affection on the auspicious occasions. Please don’t evaluate or weigh those affectionate pieces, which can make marriage just weightless. Even if lakhs of Indian parents can’t give these, few words of blessings from them are more than enough for the couple.

I have used QuickFix, an adhesive which binds anything within seconds ( The company is not going to pay me for this advertisement ) . After using QuickFix , I have found that, it’s very similar to our dowry system which can fix a bore male with jolly female ( may be vice versa too), a beautiful girl ( who later puts a case against him ) to a corrupt serviceman, a rich man’s lazy girl to an NRI doctor and so on ( Few more good examples you may add ). The same adhesive sticks the saas ( jo ki kabhi bahu thi) with the false pride (not bride). No wonder it may stick the not so faithful husbands and wives too. Why to surprise if it sticks the low paid police man and fame/money seeking NGOs? Last but not least it sticks the thread of discussion to amend/modify the law rather than abolish the dowry system completely with each individual effort.

The another way is talk dowry as bad word, like murder, theft or any other heinous word you can use for.

Thanks for reading me the promise takers…To your satisfaction, I have declared before the court in a affidavit, not to take or give any dowry along with one of my friend in a anti-dowry movement. Need confirmation? Then do know the details after writing me.

Dear prospective grooms and brides (also to be parents-in-laws), Have you guts to join me!!



  1. You have picked up a very nice topic. I agree with your saying but I afraid how practical it is in real world…

    Waise in Nepal there is no such customs like in India. I mean not like in India, Tilak, dahej. Dahej is not compulsion like in India but people give. I’m talking about Nepalese.

    Hey where are you? Not seeing you around.

    🙂 Silky Moon

  2. Get a free life insurance quote by clicking here. The quote is free, and insurance is cheap, can you afford to live without it?

  3. A better solution to stop dowry:

    Can urban women marry down ?


  5. hi pp
    guess who i am.

    who know about climbing on bimbo in a village callad dhamdaha. who know about 4 brothers, other 3 are tissue, ashu n sanjay nirlaj.

    mail me

    i am at bhagalpur in hindustan as sub editor. cell no 9934629134

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